Last Day of Daycare

Lexi And William,

You just finished your last day of daycare and your hormonal mom is a tid bit emotional, very similar to your first day, but for very different reasons.

Growing up, I always had a negative connotation of daycare. Most of my cousins and my friends grew up with stay at home moms and the kids that did go to daycare weren’t always the most well-behaved. I’m sure there were other reasons for this, but I had always made the connection that it was because they went to daycare (I know, not very logical!)

So when the time came for you to both go to daycare I really struggled. Lexi was 2.5 and very shy, timid and reserved and I was so worried about her feeling abandoned and lost and not being able to make friends. William was 4 months and was just sad he wasn’t going to get to bond with Daddy in the same way Lexi did.

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My fears about Lexi were spot on. She experienced all of those things and would scream and cry every morning before leaving. There was bribery and me trying to distract her on the ride there (airplanes in the sky, the tunnel, trains, and lots of listening to twinkle twinkle) to help make the situation better. I set up playdates outside of school so she could become more comfortable with friends in her class. After many talks with the teachers, we figured out she really struggled in the transition moments–going from group time to activity time or to lunch time and pinned it down to her not knowing what to do in those moments and probably feeling lost and confused. As a result, every night we reviewed our day from the beloved daily connect app to look at all the fun she had and review what her schedule looked like each day. We also talked about it every morning on the ride in to help her learn what to expect at each moment throughout the day. In general, I felt like it was a pretty tough transition and took several months.

However, after that transition, some amazing things started to happen. Lexi started to recognize her name and then she could spell it and then she could write it. She started to make friends on her own and discovered her love for art projects. Her confidence grew, she learned how to tell stories, participated in group time, talked to people she didn’t know and learned about complex things for a 4-year-old like symmetry, ecosystems and the world’s wonders. And William, your time spent there was different, but it will impact you in different ways. You know how to stand up for yourself and don’t let other kids push your around. You’re independent and insist on doing everything yourself as that is really what the teachers encourage. You can put your pants/shorts/shoes on and off by yourself, do really really well drinking from cups and using adult silverware and kicking and throwing balls.

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Not only did you both thrive, I loved having you be so close to me throughout the day. Being able to nurse William instead of pump was a Godsend. I loved the lunch dates I had with Lexi. As maddening as it was some days, majority of the time, I loved spending 2 extra hours with you in our car rides. You would tell me about your days, what made you happy and sad, what you learned about or the books you read and would often play games like ‘I spy’ and ‘Is this a truth or a lie?’

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The teachers you had were so amazing and dedicated. They did such a great job of pairing up personalities to have one teacher that is a little more firm and lays the law down with another who is a little more affectionate to play to the different things you need throughout the day.

Overall, I’ve realized that daycare can be an amazing thing and you have both learned and developed in ways that you never would have at home and am so grateful for the wonderful experience we all had.

Onto out next phase which I’m sure will bring equally amazing opportunities

Love,

Mama

Baby #3 35 Weeks

Little Nugs,

What a busy and eventful week this has been. It started of celebrating your Auntie Sheila’s wedding. It was perfect in every way. It was intimate and personal and relaxed/low key. The ceremony was in Grammy and Papa’s back yard and then we headed over to the new park pavilion to celebrate with friends and family. Lexi was the flower girl and she was so darn cute in her little white dress, head full of curls and walking out to Moana. I cried. It was around 90 degrees and my dress wasn’t the most breathable one out there and I was pretty darn hot and it exhausted me to no end. It took me until Wednesday to feel somewhat recouped.

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Then this Friday, Daddy had his last official day of work. He will contract throughout the summer before transitioning to staying home with your three nuggets full time. I also had my last day of work before leave and the big kids had their last day of day care. It was a little bit of an emotional day and I’ll have to write another post on my feelings for that.

Thursday morning, I went in for my weekly lab work and Friday I had my appointment. Ultrasound BPP went great and once again you passed your test. You also have flipped and are head down again. When meeting with the Dr. (Dr. G was on vaca) she game me the official diagnosis of cholestasis and a prescription to help manage the bile liver levels. Last week’s tests came back as a 12 and she said anything above a 10 is considered cholestasis. Fortunately, my liver enzyme levels had come back down from the 100’s to a normal level which she said was really really good. Although I have an official diagnosis, nothing will really change in my care as they said they have already been treating me as if I did have it. Next week, I go in on Tuesday for a growth ultrasound and BPP and my typical 36 week appointment. I’ll also go in on Thursday for another BPP and then the plan is to deliver on the following Tuesday (the 20th) So crazy that they expect you to be here in 10 days!

For the most part, I’m feeling OK. I know things could be worse, but still not feeling the greatest either. I ended up filling my prescription last week to help me sleep and control the itching. ┬áIt helped control the itching at night and sleep through the night–which really helped get me back on track after the excitement of Sheila’s wedding. However, this past night was awful. I’ve been up since 4 and itching and scratching every part of my body and it is pretty terrible and I’m very tired.

Other interesting notes: I’m only interested in eating healthy foods like fruits and salads. Anything greasy or fatty just isn’t appetizing. I think this has something to do with the fact my liver isn’t functioning properly, but maybe that is just in my head? Blood pressure continues to be nice and low, movement is active, and I’m still under the 20 lbs weight gain. Also, I’m so relieved to be done with work. It is just one less thing to think about and hopefully enjoy some good quality time with the big kids before you arrive. IMG_8236

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With Lexi, we were just finishing up the fireplace project, your nursery and prepping for my showers. I can’t believe how much more I was able to do at this point in her pregnancy than yours. There is no way I could do all that work–I can barely walk up the stairs with you. With William, I was feeling more similar to how I feel with you, just probably not as extensive. I was very worried about how life would change and all the hardships that come with a newborn. It’s interesting how the challenges just shift. There are many challenging things about these last few weeks of pregnancy and you’re so excited for them to all go away, but once the baby is born, they are replaced by other challenges like no sleep and the milk coming in and teaching the baby to nurse and still paying attention to the other two munchkins. Time will tell my munchkin. With you coming early I’m pretty nervous about your temperament and colic as I feel like every single baby that I know that has been early is much more difficult than a baby that ‘cooks’ a little longer. Please be good to your mama?!?!

Love,

Mama

Baby #3 34 Weeks

Little Babe,

You sure like to keep things interesting. This past Tuesday was a rough night. I woke up at 3:00 in the morning (really Wednesday) and couldn’t stop itching. As I mentioned before, I started having the itchiness appear on my feet and hands. While on my way into work on Wednesday morning, I called the Dr to see if they had my lab results back yet and my bile acids were a 6, which they said was within normal range. I mentioned that my symptoms had gotten worse and was now having the itchiness on my palms and soles. This immediately worried them and they started asking how long I’ve had these symptoms and requested I come into the office that morning to get more blood work done. I had an appointment the next day, but they said they didn’t want to wait that long so we turned around and went into the office to get more blood work drawn.

I was able to meet with a nurse practitioner and she confirmed that the Bile acid tests are the true indicator of Cholestasis and until that comes back positive, they wouldn’t do anything. She also informed me that this next round of blood work would be a better indicator of what is happening inside my body as some people just have elevated liver enzymes while pregnant but now they have something to compare, it will help them understand if things are getting worse or maybe i just have heightened levels. They also prescribed a pregnancy safe medication to help me get sleep at night and decrease the itching.

This morning, I went in for my Bio-physical test of the baby and a visit with the nurse practitioner. The bio-physical went great. You were sleeping so it took a little longer to get your breathing and movements. They even had to put a little buzzer against my belly to wake you up. Overall, you passed all your tests–the only downfall is you flipped and are breech again. That must have happened over night because when I was walking on Thursday, I swear I could feel your head pushing on my bladder.

Fortunately, Dr. G wanted to talk to me, even though she had a super busy schedule I am so grateful that I was able to talk to her. She confirmed that my liver enzyme levels had risen from when they were previously tested (now in the 100s) but still weren’t at a super dangerous level. We also talked about the her general treatment and delivery approach. She believes I have cholestasis, my blood work just isn’t showing it yet and, she is going to treat me as if I do have it, which means continuing to run weekly blood work and weekly bio-physical tests. If for some reason the Bile tests don’t come back positive by my 36 week appointment, she is going to call the hospital and request I be induced at 37 weeks as she doesn’t feel it is safe to go beyond that given my symptoms and past history.

At the end of today, I did get a call informing me my bile levels were at a 12 this time, so they doubled from the previous, but it was still considered ‘normal’. I’m not sure what is considered ab-normal, so I’ll call to find out, next week. But in general, I feel so much more comfortable knowing we have a tentative plan in place.

Other things happening at 34 weeks pregnant. Overall, I’m really starting to feel the discomfort of being 8 months pregnant. My belly is getting heavy and some of my underwear is getting tight. Breathing continues to be challenging and feel like I should carry an oxygen mask around with me. I just don’t feel like I can catch my breath whether I’m lying in bed, sitting or standing in a line somewhere. Everyday tasks are getting challenging–like getting in and out of van, going up stairs, bending over or standing up. Food is pretty unappealing right now–especially anything that is unhealthy or greasy. So I’m just listening to what my body needs and eating lots of salads and fruit.

We’ve got a big weekend coming up with Auntie Sheila getting married. It is supposed to be super hot, so hoping that I survive!!

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Love,

Mama